Key # 5 - Accept / Reconcile Differences
We must always remember that God created each of us in His Image and we are perfectly unique. You cannot find another one just like you (thank God!). As such, we do have differences; differences in our view of life, in our character, in our habits, in our opinion and so on. Such differences are healthy, as long as we can accept them or are able to reconcile them. This is one of the most vital keys to achieving power in the family.
1 Peter 3:10 expounds, "....Whoever would love life and see good days must keep his tongue from evil and his lips from deceitful speech."
The tongue usually plays up differences between spouses and amongst family members. One careless word spoken against your spouse or children could create a wild fire that can burn beyond control. Strife and quarrels follow.... anger, hatred and unforgiveness result. A family breaks! Can we see the sequence? Little wonder why Peter specifically taught that if we would love life, we MUST keep our tongue from evil.
The bible tells us that the prayer of a righteous man avails much. Conversely, the prayers coming from one who argues, fights and fusses will be hindered. Remember this - we cannot overcome by positive confessions, what we have already destroyed by our negative words and actions! It is pointless to confess blessings, peace and prosperity if our daily life is filled with strife and bitterness. Unless, yes, unless there is repentance and seeking forgiveness from the ones we have hurt by our careless words.
So what do we need to do? One absolutely vital contribution to a harmonious family relationship is the ability to say, "I was wrong, please forgive me." This cuts across age and position in the family. My wife and I say that to our children whenever we wronged them. By showing the example, the children learn to do the same whenever they make mistakes. And most importantly, avoid making those mistakes in the first place.
Our human weaknesses will continue to manifest themselves time and again. There will be times that we will still get angry at each other or disagree with each other. And when we do, let us always remember the reconciliation instructions given in Eph 4:26 "...Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry." Make it a habit to reconcile your differences with your spouse, children and siblings as soon as it is practical. Keep short accounts; do not carry the anger and associated burden beyond the burst of our temper. Do not allow the molehill to transform itself into a mountain.
Keeping our tongues from evil is a sure prevention against family strife. Combined with Key # 3 - Speak well of each other, this practice will surely contribute to harmony and power in the family.
Suggestions for practice:
1. Pray daily, preferably in the morning, for God’s help to guard our tongues from careless and hurtful words.
2. Pray also for His help to be quick to listen and slow to speak and quick to forgive and slow to “return fire”.
3. If you fall and said something silly, confess to the person you said those words too and seek forgiveness. Pray together and ask the other person to pray for you to over come this weakness.
4. If you are the recipient of careless words, do not retaliate. Instead, pray for the person who said those words and have a heart of forgiveness. After all, he or she is your loved one!
What is your opinion? Tell us by clicking "Comments"...
The next key is about communication within the family. Coming on 20th Oct.
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